“Dont follow your heart, follow the Holy Spirit”

I entered my home in Butajira last night around 630pm feeling a little down. Upon walking into our living room, I noticed another new face sitting on the couch. Great…another person to meet, another name I would inevitably forget, and now I have to mentally gather all the Amharic words I know so I can create small talk with this new guy. I was just not in the mood and my family has been having many visitors lately.

I decided to say hello, smile and amuse the man for about 5 min before telling my family that I wanted to take a shower. I made sure to take extra long to gather my towel, soap, flash lights and everything I needed to shower at night time, AND I took a very long shower. Which is really hard to do when its a cold shower and you don't really enjoy being stung by the ice cold water at night. But I was determined to have the guest leave before I had to go back in there, talk and sit with him and my family for 3 cups of coffee, when all I wanted to do was sleep.

When I walked into the room, it seemed like no time had passed at all. Everyone sat in the exact same positions just smiling and laughing and feeling all kinds of happiness that I was apparently missing from my life. Today just wasn't a very cheery day. A kid punched me on purpose, I was craving a ton of foods that aren't found in country, and I had been feeling spiritually deprived for awhile now. I missed the bible studies with my family, I missed praying with my friends, I missed the community I had been building at The Vine, I missed driving in my car while blasting and screaming/singing worship songs. I just missed it all. So I walked into my room, closed the door halfway, and proceeded to just waste the night away alone.

“Ashhh eeyyyy” My inate called.
“Abet” Yes I replied, while heading back into the living room.
“ We will pray” she said with a smile.

“oh…. ok.” I said with a sigh.

My Ethiopian family is very religious and we have had many discussions about their denomination of Christianity and how it relates to my own. In short we have all the same core beliefs, the only difference is their belief that Christians should not sing, dance or listen to music that is not worshiping Jesus. And I cant argue with that, I believe that all things should be done to glorify God, but its not like you’ll go to hell if you shake your groove thang every once in awhile haha. And my family is very charismatic…which I enjoy.

This was not my first time sitting through one of their praying sessions. The first time, a male friend of my abate took out his bible and began preaching. His voice started off steady, even, deep and full of love. He spoke slowly and with emphasis. His speech sped up, as his voice filled with emotion and passion, and as he continued his voice grew louder. He would say certain phrases and my family in unison would say “Amen!” “Amen!”  “Amen!” It was like the “Amens” were rehearsed and everyone knew when to say them, as if on cue. But instead of sounding fake and unauthentic, the agreement and unison “Amen’s”, were deeply moving. And they seemed to grow in vigor with the preachers sermon. I bowed my head, saying my own little prayer, while listening to the man preach and pray out loud in Amharic. Knowing that all of us, from different worlds, speaking different languages, were here together and praying, thanking and loving the same God was incredibly moving. I had no idea what the man was saying, but I felt the holy spirit move that night, I felt the presence of the lord.

But this night I was dragging my feet and just not in the mood. I told myself that this prayer was going to last too long, that it was in Amharic and how did I REALLY know what they were praying about, or praying too?

The man began his sermon, I bowed my head and closed my eyes, telling myself that i was just going to plan my day for tomorrow instead of listening. When I began hearing the mans voice, and noticed that he was speaking in English!

“1st Genesis says that God is the creator of all. He has made you, he has made everything, and it is good.”

I looked up at him and smiled. And he continued.

“Because the Holy spirit is in you, and you are in God, you are greater than anything in this world. Than any satanic thing and you have power over it! Greater is he that is in you! He has life planned for you, and all good things…”

And he continued. His sermon was mainly in Amharic, but every few sentences, he would translate and change it into English. And I knew he was doing it just for me. I knew my family brought this man, their friend, into our house to preach just for me. And I was overcome with joy.

“ Amen!” “Amen!” I shouted as he preached his broken English, and my family laughed, because I was the one saying the “Amen’s” this time.

My heart was overcome with gratitude. My sour mood and negative thoughts dissipated. My spirit was fed, and for the first time in a long time, I really felt at home. As I went to bed that night, I was so filled with emotion that I began to cry. God is so good, and I am so blessed… and I hope my inate doesn't hear me crying now, or this is going to be really weird and difficult to explain with this language barrier.

Vlog #6

Site visit and the only Ethiopian I dislike

After learning about my future home in Wolliso, Peace Corps set up small cross country trips for all 70 volunteers-in-training to visit their future sites. We all left for Addis Ababa, and from there we would go our separate ways, some flying, and others busing to our new locations. We of course weren't going to be traveling alone, well not yet. Peace Corps had set up English speaking members of our community to meet us in Addis and eventually travel with us to our sites to show us around.

My community member, who shall remain unnamed was very.... odd.

"Hi its so nice to meet you!" I greeted him with a big smile and handshake.
"Hello, wow you are so beautiful!" He replied

Ha ha, I laughed nervously.
"So what do you do in Wolliso?" I inquired.

" I am an English teacher. You will be teaching at the same highschool I work at!" He said with a big grin. "I will show you everything you need to know, and you will be warmly welcomed", he continued as he grabbed both my hands.

"The town will love you. You are so fortunate to be coming to Wolliso! And we are so fortunate to have you!"

There was a lack of personal space during this encounter, and it didnt help that this mans breath was not on point. I have walked passed things on the street that smelled better than his breath. I began timing my breathing to his own inhales and exhales, as to avoid smelling the stench that escaped from his mouth.

"oh wow ok, that sounds so nice."
"Are you married Ashley?" He asked.
"Oh, uhm no I'm not" I replied, reminding myself that asking about marital status was a norm here in Ethiopia and meant nothing special.

"I am not married either!." He said, "Just living the single life!"

I looked at my community liaison again, he clearly was in his late 40's - 50's. Why isn't this man married I wondered... Its very odd for a man his age to be single.

"So have you lived in Wolliso your entire life?" I asked
"Oh no, my family is from Addis Ababa....

and he continued telling me his life story. Every few seconds, as he spoke he would touch my arm, as if to get my attention, but I was already face to face with him, so the touchy-ness bothered me. In the middle of his sentence he pulls out a pen and drops it on the floor. I bend down on one knee to retrieve it for him.

"Oh wow Ashley, you look flexible. This is good." He said with a smile and kind eyes.

What? I wonder to myself. Why is this man telling me I'm flexible?! It's not like I just did the splits! This is just too weird and hes too toucy-feely and I dont like that he's not married. I was just getting weird vibes, so I decided to complain to Peace Corps staff.

"Hey Ayu, my community Liaison is kind of weird and I think hes being very unprofessional. He made a few unsettling comments, told me I was pretty, and flexible, and that hes single, and he keeps touching me! I dont want to overreact, but it makes me feel uncomfortable and I just want to know if this is culturally normal, or if hes trying to hint towards something?" I reported.

"It is very normal to mention marital status and to ask you of yours, but I will speak with him to make sure, and to tell him that the touching makes you uncomfortable, ok?"

The next day things seemed much better. My liaison did not touch me one time, he did not call me pretty or make weird comments, but he was incredibly rude and demanding, and very passive aggressive.

Peace Corps instructed all volunteers and their liaisons to discuss the plan for the following days site visit and to get an idea on our future teaching assignments.

"So what are my options for grades I can teach at the school?" I asked.
"I have already chosen the grade you will teach" my liaison announced. "You will teach grade 9!"

"Oh ok, well that's one idea, but I was hoping I could teach grades 11 and 12" I replied. "I think I would be a better fit - My liaison held his hand up to stop me mid sentence.

"You will teach grade 9, they need it the most. I have discussed it with the principal. Now during the first week you are to watch an Ethiopian teacher to see how they teach a classroom.." he said.

I cant believe this funky breath man, just cut me off mid sentence and already "chose" my grade. Who does he think this is?!  I thought to myself.... Whatever, hes only another English teacher. I'll discuss this with the principal when I visit my site...

"ok I guess we can discuss the grade I will teach later, but as far as observing Ethiopian teachers.. I would prefer to watch a female teacher, to see how a female teacher handles her students".

"No, you will watch me."

"But I think seeing a female teacher will be most beneficial" I said, I was not going down without a fight.

"No, you will watch me."

"I'm sure you are a great teacher, so maybe I will watch you for the first 2 days, and then I will watch a Female teacher."

"Maybe,  that might be good. I might allow it."

Extremely annoyed with my liaison and his lack of respect towards me, I decided to avoid him during lunch and all the breaks we had between sessions. Whenever I saw him, I would smile, and so would he, but there was hate behind both of our eyes. During every conversation when I would discuss what I wanted, he would cut me off mid sentence by holding up his hand. I didn't know if Ayu had talked to him and this is why he was so rude towards me, or if it was just because he was an older man dealing with a younger woman, and he didn't respect me as a coworker due to my age and sex.

"You will love Wolliso!" He enthusiastically said "And the students will love you because you look Ethiopian! Your brown skin and your curly hair, you look just like an Ethiopian, the only difference is that you are HUGE!" He said loudly and with a straight face.

I busted out laughing.

This man thinks he is slick. Culturally Ethiopians often tell their loved ones or friends that they are fat, skinny, ugly or that they have pimples. It is not considered rude to make remarks based on someones appearance. But this guy... I know he doesn't like me. Hes been rude all day and he has worked with peace corps and Americans often enough to know that this is considered mean.

Homeboy just called me fat and thinks he can get away with it under "his culture". I can not believe this.

I just kept laughing.
"Well thank you" I replied.

The following day during site visits I completely ignored the man. He took me to set up a bank account, to meet the Mayor of my soon to be home town, Wolisso,  and to meet the principal and director of my school. I spoke to everyone I encountered in my new town,  I made small talk, I smiled and chatted with them all. But I did not even put on a fake smile for my liaison. After viewing the high school where I will be teaching, and meeting the school director, my liaison did something that still confuses me.

"So, it is my opinion that Ashleys schedule should be the exact same as mine. All her classes should be placed near mine and if I work in the morning shift, she should work in the morning shift!" He told our school director.

What is this dudes deal! I clearly despise him, and he hates me... but why is he telling our director this?! I thought to myself. There is no way I want to work with or near this man, is he just trying to make my next 2 years a living hell?!

As soon as my liaison left the office. I spoke to the director.

"Hi, I heard my liaison say that I should have classes near him and at the same time.. I'm wondering why?"

"uhmm, for social purposes I guess. I think since you both speak good English, that he thinks it will be beneficial for you! You can arrive at school with him and leave for home with him and it will be easier."

"Oh, well you see I would rather work on my Amharic..."

"You do not want to work with him?" My director asked

"Its not that.. its just I already know him. I would much rather work with the other teachers in the school and get to know them..."

"Ok. I understand. Whatever you want!" My director said with a smile.

Thank God I got out of that situation. I never want to see that man and his funky breath again.

I stayed  4 days in Wolisso, walking around and getting to know my community, but after that first day in town with my liaison, I never worked or saw him those entire 4 days. I think he thought I went back to Addis or Butajira by myself. I don't really know and I don't really care. One awesome thing that came from my site visit was briefly seeing my future home! (Pics below)

I move into this house, late September. It is a 1 bedroom home and I am very excited about it.

The 14 year old Maid. and Site Announcements!

   Meet Meheret

 

 This is Meheret, my families seratainya. In Ethiopia it is very common for families to have seratainyas (maids) that do all the cleaning, cooking, and washing in the household. Seratainyas are taught to avoid eye contact, and never look their employers in the eye, especially the men in the family. Sometimes they aren't treated very well, as they are considered "second class citizens". My families seratainya, is treated with kindness, but there are a few things that make me uncomfortable about her situation.

For one, she has the same 3 outfits that she always wears. Her clothes are dirty, worn and tattered. My Ethiopian family isn't very well off, but they all have more clothes than Meheret. She also sleeps in the room with all the animals. It took me awhile to figure out where she was sleeping and living, but when I did, it was hard to ignore. Meherts bed is under the same roof as the chicken coop. The chickens sleep on one side of the room and she sleeps on the other side, the cow also sleeps in the same vicinity. Knowing how kind and loving my family is, it was hard for me to reconcile how they let Meheret live in such conditions, and how most Ethiopians let their Seratainyas live. But I have come to realize that many Seratainyas are saved from much harsher lifes by being taken in and working for other Ethiopian families. Seratainyas are not slaves, they decide to work for their employers and they can quit just as easily. Meheret eats nutritious food, has a roof over her head and is a member of my family here. She is always seen smiling and playing with my other host sister Beselot, and she seems to be very happy. Having Seratainyas is apart of Ethiopian culture and not all Seratainyas are young girls. Many families have grown women with children of their own working for them as the Seratainya. Each case is different and unique, and being a Seratainya is basically the same as being a live in housekeeper.

Meheret is related to my abate in some way. I don't know if she is a niece, or 2nd cousin twice removed. It has not been explained, as I've been told not to pry too much into Meherts history, because it is seen as rude. But I do know that she is family. She grew up in a very rural and poor town and because her family was in poverty and unable to care for her. Their options were to marry her off to an older man, when she was young, or to send her to work as a Seratainya. They of course, did the latter. Meheret is only 14 years old now, or 13.. she is not sure of her age. (Many Ethiopians do not know their exact age) And she has been working for my family for a few years. She is not in school, but she might continue her education in a few years. Seratainyas get paid a meager wage by the family they live and work for, but they are known to save every penny and eventually leave their families to make a life for themselves. Heres to Meheret doing the same :)


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Site Announcements

I am nearing completion of Pre Service Training here in Ethiopia. I’m more than halfway through with this 3 month training and getting closer and closer to my actual Peace Corps Service. With 1 month left to go before I am sent to live on my own in the world, Peace Corps reveals to us trainees where in Ethiopia we will be calling home for the remaining 2 years.

The week was full of anticipation, excitement and worry. The town of Butajira is beautiful, I love the trees, the livestock wondering around and just the feel of the place, but the idea of seeing more of the country is exhilarating.  Will my new town have waterfalls? Elephants or Hippos? Will it be in a rainforest? or atop a snowy mountain?

The possibilities are endless in Ethiopia. Its climate is so varied, its unbelievable.

70 Peace Corps trainees sat in a large conference room of a hotel, just waiting to hear their name be called as our Peace Corps Staff member called out site names and its matching volunteer.

“Remember, that you agreed to serve wherever Peace Corps places you, to be flexible, and understanding. That although many of you told us what you wanted in a site; internet, to be near a certain person, or the size of your city, etc, please know that our first priority in deciding your future placements was finding a job that matched your experience, your needs and vice versa. Remember that you came into Peace Corps Africa to serve, and you promised to do so potentially without Internet, electricity and running water.”

Life is calling. How far will you go?

The Peace Corps slogan ran in my head and a smile slowly spread across my face as I romanticized living my next two years in a mud hut with a thatched roof. Or amongst farmers and their livestock on fertile land. Waterfalls! Elephants! Hippos! A rainforest or snow!! I squealed in anticipation once more.

The names were called and envelops handed out with detailed information about our future sites.

“Amy’s site has a population of ONLY 4,000 people!! She doesn't have running water or internet in her village. Everyone goes to a village well to collect water!”

“Wow, that's going to be an amazing adventure for her! Such a different lifestyle and a true Peace Corps experience.”

“Izzy is living super close to that huge town down south with all the Rastas! Its like a jungle down there, its so green and its where they grow a lot of coffee beans!”

“Izzy is so lucky…but did you hear about Beto? He’s going to be the first Peace Corps volunteer his village has every had! So he might be the first American, his townspeople have ever met and his town has 2,000 people in it, its in the coldest region of Ethiopia on top of a mountain and it snows!!”

These are some of the sites a few of my friends are going to be calling home for the next two years and I was definitely jealous hearing about this entirely new world they would have to grow accustomed too. Their experience is what I imagined my peace corps experience to be like in a way… so when I heard about my future site….

Town:         Welliso
Region:    Oromia
Population:     60k
Nearest city:    Addis Ababa (2-3hr drive)
Site mates:    Yes, 2 site mates
Internet:    Readily available
Cell phone:    Yes
Running water: Yes
Landline:     Yes

Summary:    Been there. Done that. Nothing New. No challenges. No new experiences. Posh    
        corps, not peace corps.

So yeah, I was a little disappointed. My future town is located very close to Addis and Butajira. I knew it couldn't vary much from what I have already experienced in Ethiopia, as far as climate and weather. My dreams of change slowly became uncertain questions. Waterfalls? Elephants? Hippos? Snow?

And I was put in a little bit of a funk. I cried out to my friends in America, and here were their loving responses:

“Girl God, has blessed you! He knows where he wants you to be and I’m sure he knew you couldn't handle that Tarzan lifestyle you’ve been dreaming about.”

“Ashley I understand wanting to experience something different, but you have to remember that you already are! You are earning major street cred with me, I mean you might have internet and everything, but you still have to poop in a hole and wash your clothes by hand out there!”

“Girl, call it all JOY!!”

“If you don't shut up Ashley… oh my goodness I can't believe you’re complaining about having all the amenities that everyone else probably wants!”

“Your dad must have really been praying for you, since you got the hook up!”

and so the comments went. In all honesty they made me laugh, and they did help a bit in there own way. After speaking to a few people I did realize that I was being a huge brat, and I got to really look at all the pros of my future site.

One being:  that when I do want to see what life is like in a REALLY remote part of Ethiopia, Im so close to Addis Ababa, that I'm able to access buses and planes to fly me all over the country anytime I want. :)

SOOO for all those interested.. THIS is the address to my new home!

Ashley Quarles
P.O. Box 79
Oromia Regional State
South - West Shoa Zone
Wolisso Town
Ethiopia


It takes about a month for mail to go through... sometimes longer. (so send things NOW lol) But I'd love to get some letters! or any of these goodies...

 Quaker Oatmeal (HIGH FIBER) I can never have too much of this stuff!! Send as many boxes as you want!                                                     

PowerBars! The Chocolate Peanut Butter kind if you'd be so kind.

 

Justins Hazelnut butter... or Cookie butter. Or Nutella... any will do.

ANY Seasonings

my favorites are:

Garlic salt.

**Italian Seasoning**

Lawrys Seasoning salt

Hot sauce

Soy sauce

 

Vlog#5 A Day in the life

Vlog #4 Why Peace Corps?

Poor in wealth but rich in love & being Black in Peace Corps

“Listen, my dear brothers: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him?  - James 2:5



 a little girl stood and just asking for money as I walked past. I gave her a smile and a prayer. I hope it was enough.

   Sometimes I’ll be reading the word of God and verses that I never noticed before, later stand out to me. Its funny how your circumstances in life determine what your heart and ears are willing and ready to hear. Stumbling across James 2:5 this morning made me immediately think of my host family, and not just them, but every God fearing person I’ve met here in Africa, who in the eyes of the world are seen as poor. 

Sometimes I wonder why these people were chosen to be born on this side of the world, and I, on the other side. Was it just the luck of the draw? Why me and not them? I wonder why my family and friends have so much, and others so little. I have been born into such luxury, while so many others have been born into such hopelessness.The roles could have been so easily reversed.



But then I run across a verse like James 2:5, and I wonder who has really been born into hopelessness.

My family here, and those far worse off than them, are so rich in faith. Strong, proud, God fearing people, with the most beautiful hearts. They give their all, they give their last, they keep giving, although many would say they don’t have anything left to give. They carry a child on their backs, Gods words on their lips, and all the worlds sorrow on their shoulders, and they still smile, they still laugh. Poor in wealth, but rich in love, rich in faith, family and life.

 Part of me wonders if its easier to believe in God when he’s all you have left. Logically I would think, yes it is, but there are so many who, when at their lowest, cry out, wonder why and lose all hope.




I have been so loved, so extremely wealthy, and educated and I know I am called to use my blessings to bless others.

And although I keep telling myself that I am here to help, that I am here to serve and give. I know in my heart of hearts that I have much more to learn from this country and these people than I can ever give back.


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Word is out that Im not Habesha (Ethiopian)

Whenever I walk the streets of Butajira by myself, I get a lot of stares and looks from the townspeople. In a town of 40,000 people, it might be noticeable if a new face shows up in your little neighborhood. So I didn't mind the stares and looks, from children and adults alike. I even had 1 woman and 2 kids, on separate occasions, approach me speaking full blown Amharic, while I just stood there smiling and nodding.

It wasn't until today that I realized why they probably approached me.

 I was walking home, as I do everyday. When 5 neighborhood kids started running toward me. I stood there confused and wondered what was about to happen. When they all got within a few feet of me and began yelling out “Hello” “Hi” “Ferenji” “Hello” “America!” in what appeared to be the only English words they knew.



“Oh… Hi” I said, feeling defeated. The ruse was up. How do they all know that Im not Ethiopian anymore?! I thought to myself, and then it hit me. OH MY GOODNESS! what if the people that approached me before were testing me! And afterwards told everyone I don’t speak the language, and couldn't be Ethiopian.

Wait… maybe there is still a chance… Using my best Amharic I said, “What’s your name?” to one of the girls in the group.

“I am called Kidist” the little girl replied.

“How are you Kidist” I asked, still using my best Amharic.

“Good…” and then she spit out some rapid fire Amharic that I could not catch, but I was determined to not give up so easily…


“In - De - Gah - Na?” (Again, or repeat) I asked, when she just laughed and shook her head as if to say “Mere non-habesha mortal, just stop trying”

“Buh bye” Kidist added, before she ran off with her group.

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Ever since the townspeople figured out that Im not Ethiopian, I have been getting harassed. Its nothing really horrible or bad, but it is a little annoying. I will be walking to class by myself, and grown men will yell out to me:

“America!”
“Ameriiiiicaaaaaa!”

trying to get my attention. Two kids have approached me asking for money in English.


“Give me money!” They say
“You, give MEEEE Money!!” I reply.

I was in the suk (store) once, buying a few things. When I noticed this old man following me around the store, he was maybe in his late 60’s, so I figured I could take him if I had too, but just to play it safe, I promptly left that store, and walked into another one a few feet away. Lo and behold, the old man pops up in that store too!

Feeling a little uneasy now, I began to make a plan… “Ok, other PCV’s should be nearby, class just ended and a lot of people like to go to the restaurant upstairs for wifi, so if I walk quick enough…” But as I was thinking to myself I heard my old man stalker and the store clerk talking.

old man: “ blah blah blah” (Amharic words I did not understand)
“No, she's American” the store clerk replied in English.

What the heck!  Why is the old man asking about me?! AND HOW does this random store clerk know I’m American!!!

Its absolutely ridiculous how fast news spreads in this town, and its even more ridiculous that me being American, can be considered “News”. I still don't have it half as bad as the white female volunteers have it though. At least I have the potential to blend in, whereas they stick out like sore thumbs. One of the girls here felt the need to run from a few Ethiopian men who she says were following her, another was forcefully grabbed by a guy, as he repeatedly demanded that she buy the motorcycle he had with him. She instead resorted to hitting and violently elbowing him off of her. Another volunteer serving in Mozambique, has little kids crying when they see her, because they think she is a “white devil” and they have never seen a white person before. (check out her story HERE, its absolutely hilarious and there are photos!)

If the worst I will get, is a few random guys yelling, “America” out at me, then I will take it.

In all honesty, before signing up for the Peace Corps I was worried about what my experience would be like as an African American Volunteer.

Would my community respect me? Or will they be disappointed that they didn't get a “real American?” Will they value my opinion and advice, or will they think I have nothing to offer them because I am black, just like they are.

I went into Ethiopia, with these little fears and worries, just waiting to see what would happen, but a 3rd year black PCV, helped ease my mind.

“As a black volunteer, you may not get all the Ferengi (foreigner) perks, that the other volunteers get. People may not let you skip lines in the grocery store or bank, kids may not get excited to see you, and sometimes, yes, people will not respect your opinion as much, or think you can really offer change. But you will get the advantage of integrating into your communities faster. You will form friendships quicker than other volunteers and the friendships you do form, will be much deeper. Your community members will share more of their lives with you and through these friendships and relationships you can gain trust and respect. Black volunteers can do just as much as any other type of volunteer, and many times, they do even more.”

Listening to this experienced volunteer share her stories and words of wisdom was very beneficial for me. I was getting so caught up on the negatives that I did not think of the positives. I wanted to serve in Africa particularly, because I wanted to work, live with, and help other black people.

 I want the students that I teach and the community that I work with, to see themselves in me, and I in them. I thought the culture would be richer in Africa, the food - better, and I loved the idea of being surrounded by people who looked just like me.

I never once thought that I’d “feel at home” here, or that I would seamlessly fit in. In fact, being in Africa, has made me realize exactly how “American” I really am. But for some unexplained reason, there is a connection. There is something there, just a comfort perhaps and understanding that although, I am America, I am also Africa.



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